I love my social media. Facebook for keeping in touch with friends spread out across the globe and reconnecting with those people you lost touch with years ago. Twitter for being able to get fast headlines and news, seeing what info other people or companies are sharing and spreading, and reaching out to otherwise complete strangers. Instagram for displaying a selective visual diary of your life, and being able to see the world through other people’s eyes.
I know many people who dismiss social media for one reason or another, and I completely understand the viewpoint that it hinders our face-to-face interaction abilities. In fact, I completely agree with it, and when I see kids and teens with their faces glued to their phones, it drives me crazy. Personally, though, having lived in 3 different countries and having had the privilege of meeting and making friends around the world, social media (especially Facebook) is essential to me for keeping in touch with those people. Do I have regular interaction and conversation with most of these friends? No. But I do like knowing that I can get a summary of their current life by scrolling through my timeline, and that I can quickly reach out to them, whether to send birthday wishes or just to check in and see how they are. I’m not much of a phone person and personal email often falls to the wayside for one reason or another.
But then the evil, unhealthy side of social media rears its ugly head. You start comparing your life to others. If you’re in a not-so-great chapter of your life, it’s easy to start feeling inadequate and like you haven’t done enough with the time you’ve had. You see your friends and acquaintances becoming doctors and lawyers, buying houses and condos, vacationing in style in Europe and exotic tropical escapes, having children, starting businesses, getting promoted up through the ranks. Meanwhile, perhaps you’ve been stuck in the same type of job for a while without any indication of a raise or promotion, you’re living paycheck to paycheck just trying to cover the rent and utilities every month, and you’ve taken your umpteenth “staycation” because that’s all you can afford.
You wonder how that person manages to excel in their career, be a hands-on parent to their 2 kids, finds time to train for a marathon, and also does charity work…when you can’t even manage to do one of those things. You start to wonder where you went wrong and what you could have or should have done differently along the way.
But then you remember that the lives people present on social media are just glossy versions of the real thing. After all, who really wants to air their dirty laundry in “public”? I know that I tend to only post about the good and happy things – frivolities, really – and I don’t doubt that others do the same. The person who just posted about getting an amazing promotion? Maybe behind the scenes they’ve been battling a crumbling marriage. Or the new lawyer? They might be drowning in student debt so massive that they lay awake at night wondering how on earth they’re going to pay it off. And the super posh one who posts all of those photos of the fabulous time they’re having in some exotic locale? Perhaps that person is suffering from severe depression and is just trying to hide it from the world.
When I have these moments of clarity, I cancel the little pity party that was just getting started in my head and try to be grateful for what I do have. The typos in my life are what have led me to where I am today, and they continue to shape me into the person that I will eventually become. Do I envy those people who have known from early on who they are and who they want to be? Of course. I wish I had that assuredness and ability to pinpoint my goals in life. Do I know what I want to be “when I grow up”? Nope, not a clue. And I’m pretty sure I grew up a long time ago.
My missteps (never managing to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, quitting a job without a backup plan, staying in an apartment even after the rent shot up) have all been learning experiences, and without them, a lot of things in my life never would have happened. I would not have met my husband or made some lifelong friends because of a decision to teach English overseas after college, instead of heading straight into the work force. I wouldn’t be living in Africa and have the chance to explore a completely different culture and learn more about the world and its people because my husband and I had to break up with New York (she was being a bitch).
I have an incredibly supportive mother who has been behind me in all of the choices that I’ve made, whether or not they’ve been the right choice. My husband, despite the ups and downs we’ve had in terms of jobs and money, is still my best friend and he loves me unconditionally (quirks, bad dance moves, and all). We may not have kids (yet) but we have an awesome cat that likes to play fetch and purrs like there’s no tomorrow. Over the years I’ve had the chance to discover and develop my passion for baking. I don’t know that I have the desire to ever take it to a professional level, but it’s something that I know I’m good at and enjoy doing. And right now, because I am not able to work yet, I have a lot of time to read new books, bake new things, and in general think about my priorities and goals for the near future.
My thirties are proving to be challenging but also filled with new adventures. I embrace the changes that are to come, and look forward to more life typos and quirks because they keep it interesting, to say the least.
Typos and Quirks 